Love Shouldn’t Hurt: Understanding Domestic Violence in North Carolina

What is domestic violence? In North Carolina, domestic violence is when someone you are in a personal relationship with (or were in a personal relationship with) commits one of the following acts against you or your child who lives with you:

·         Does, or attempts to, physically harm you.

·         Places you or a member of your family in fear of serious bodily harm.

·         Harasses you to the point of inflicting substantial emotional distress.

·         Commits sexual assault or sexually related offenses.

The first question you need to ask is what constitutes a “personal relationship”, such that the North Carolina Domestic Violence statutes apply. A “personal relationship” has been defined as follows:

·         Current or former spouses.

·         Current and former dating partners.

·         Parties who share a child.

·         Parties who live together (or used to).

·         Certain familial relationships such as parent-child or grandparent-grandchild.

If you are the victim of domestic violence, you have civil and potentially criminal remedies available to you, including the filing of a Complaint for Domestic Violence Protective Order seeking immediate and long-term protection. Too often, victims stay silent, whether it be out of fear of retaliation, fear of being revictimized or some internal shame or guilt. Being prepared and proactive can help reduce your fears. Here are some things you can do to help with your case:

·         Do not hesitate. The longer you wait to seek relief from the Court, the less fearful you may appear to the Court.

·         Document, document, document. Take pictures of your injuries. Save text messages or other written communication. Save audio or video footage. You need to be prepared to present your case against the “I didn’t do it” defense.

·         If appropriate, call the police.

For some, a Domestic Violence Protective Order is all that is needed. For others, it is just the beginning. The beginning of the end of their marriage, having to navigate divorce, custody disputes or perhaps financial disputes with their abuser. Nothing is more important than you and your loved one’s health and safety. Once you and your family are safe, if you find yourself needing assistance, we at Carter & Noland, PLLC, are here and ready to fight for you.